Kin Lane

Choosing Not To Seize The Day

I work very hard to be in the moment, and enjoy each day to its fullest. The things that usually get in my way are money and work. If I let these things own me, I have a difficult time settling in each day, and ending up thinking purely about what the future holds, and wasting this amazing moment I’ve been given each day. As I struggle to seize each day, I also find myself continuing my work to free myself of my legacy programming from people I know who spend their days completely obsessed about the possible futures, and choosing to not seize the day, opening up the opportunity for it to be seized by others.

These folks I know are obsessed with the coming financial collapse around the corner of each day, week, or month. The inevitable collapse of society that is imminent, and invasion from our government that has been a constant their entire lives. Strapping a gun to their hip, or making decisions about where they can’t or won’t go because they need to have a gun on them, in case some “event” or “incident” occurs. Shaping their days based upon any number of possible futures dreamed up as the result of obsessing over their deepest fears and anxieties–never once stopping to think about the gift of moment in time in which they have been given.

As I look out the window through the ivy leaves, why would I want to give up my day worrying about possible futures. Why let the day be seized by a possible future event, or be defined and shaped by what you fear? Seizing the day isn’t just about you taking control over this moment, it is seizing it from all of the possible futures, and seizing it from the fears you have been programmed with in your past. These ivy leaves in the window sill aren’t living today worried about winter. They aren’t obsessing over when this building will some day be torn down, or something built to block it’s growth. The ivy is living for today, this moment, absorbing any light that it can. While it may be putting down roots for the future, and built upon the past, it is living in it’s moment in the sunshine today.

Why would I waste my day writing about all of this? Well, for one, I’m seizing the day to write about what is on my mind while working to unwind my past. Two, I hope that people I know will read this, and realize that they are letting the world control them, and they are missing opportunities to spend days with those that they love, and love them. All because of stories they’ve told themselves, been told by others, and fears they cling to. You won’t be shot by bad people when you venture out into the world. The world will not collapse next week, just like the 100+ times it hasn’t done before, despite you spending your days obsessing over it. I know you feel you’ve seized control, but you’ve let your guns, racism, sexism, and world views carve out a very narrow definition of what your day could be–then seizing within that limited, closet sized view of what your day will be.

Each day I am able to seize the widest possible definition of my day that I can. Across multiple cities, states, or countries if I so choose. I do this without being shot. I do this without the financial system crumbling around me, or the government invading my home. I do this without any brown person hurting me or taking my job. I do this without dying of cancer received from being scanned at the airport. Why is it that I’m able to move around so freely? What makes it so that I can seize the day without a gun on my side, or within arms reach? It is because I’ve chosen to seize the day from the fears I’ve been programmed with in the past, and from the possible futures these fears can dream up. I’ve seized the day for me. Not for what might be. It is my day. I get to decide. I get to enjoy it to its fullest, without any concern for tomorrow.