Last Sunday I started feeling like crap again, and by this Sunday, I am writing this while feeling thankful to be alive. I can’t say that this experience was worse than my first or previous experiences (3 times now), but I can say it is a humbling experience. Monday through Friday the fever was an extreme roller coaster. Tuesday through Thursday I could barely breathe. After a week I am extremely tired, my chest hurts, and I am slowly coming back into the world.
I am seriously humbled by the power of Covid. It resets everything for me. I don’t think about work. I don’t worry about the world around me. I am simply focused on living and getting better. It really flattens you in that way. I know this isn’t the experience for everyone, but for me, it is a world altering journey. I know for some it is barely a blip for them, but for others it becomes life threatening-—with my experience somewhere in between. It confounds me that there are so many folks who are dismissive of its powers, when Covid clearly wields such strength.
I don’t feel like my life was in danger this week, but I am thankful to be alive coming out of it. It moves me that much. Covid shakes my being. There are few things in this world that leave me just sitting at peace in total silence for hours counting my blessing to be alive. I’ve had numerous brushes with death, and Covid is sobering. It leaves me wondering why so many don’t respect it. What is the basis for this? Did they not have similar experiences? Are they are too swept up in the noise of the world? IDK. Regardless, I am thankful and humbled after such an experience, and welcome every little bit of strength and life as it comes back into my body.
Life is precious. I love y’all. I love myself. I am very thankful to be here. I am very thankful for humbling experiences like this. It means everything to me to be here on a Sunday afternoon writing this. I am 52, and made it 25 years further than I ever thought I would make it. Weeks like this one force me to pause and reflect on everything I have, and show me just how lucky I am. Audrey was fortunate as she had just gone in to get her latest vaccine booster, which is something I should have done. I will go in to get a fresh dose in the next month, and I feel like getting flu and Covid shots will be something I end up doing for the rest of my life, and hopefully I won’t get taken out by one of these episodes at some point in the future.
